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[LeLou]

To be frank, the moderator of this forum is quite freak for choosing a theme like 'winter' in the middle of summer. And she wants to tell a fact about her that's going to make everyone thinks of her as freak even more. She likes warming herself in the cold. One of the most things she likes is wrapping herself with a blanket and holding a hot cup of coffee in her hands on a very cold day.

[انسه سوشي]

Hi everyone
how are you .. i hope you are fine
plz can you check my paragraph
i write this paragraph for the english exam ..
it will be in 26/10
thank you *
miss.soshi

....................................

"Write About Chimps"

"CHIMPS"

Chimps are one of the intelligent animals in the world. It is a kind of the monkeys subfamily. These intelligent monkeys live in western and central Africa. It have a very long arms and the arms are longer than legs . Also it have a short body and it coverd with black hair on most of their body. Chimps have senses very similiar to the humens senses, including hearing, sight, smell, taste and touch. In addition male chimps are larger than the females. To sum up, chimps have amazing characteristics that not found in another animals.

.................................................

[LeLou]

المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة انسه سوشي Hi everyone how are you .. i hope you are fine plz can you check my paragraph i write this paragraph for the english exam .. it will be in 26/10 thank you * miss.soshi .................................... "Write About Chimps" "CHIMPS" Chimps are one of the intelligent animals in the world. It is a kind of the monkeys subfamily. These intelligent monkeys live in western and central Africa. It have a very long arms and the arms are longer than legs . Also it have a short body and it coverd with black hair on most of their body. Chimps have senses very similiar to the humens senses, including hearing, sight, smell, taste and touch. In addition male chimps are larger than the females. To sum up, chimps have amazing characteristics that not found in another animals. .................................................

I'm not correcting the introduction right now because I'm tired and headache.
I'll only correct your paragraph..

You should have wrote:

'one of the most intelligent animals'


'They are one of monkeys family'
In biology, there's no thing such as subfamily.
If you wanted to say
فصيلة
then family is the right word.


'They have very long arms that are longer than their legs'


'Also, they have a short body and most of it is covered with black hair'
or
'Most of their short body is covered with black hair'


'similiar' should be written this way: 'similar'
'humens' should be written this way: 'humans'
or: human beings


You should add a colon after 'including'.


You should add a comma after 'in addition'.


'that are not found in any other animal'

//

I hope that helped.
Good luck on your exam
:)

[انسه سوشي]

thank you
thank you
thank you
thank you
......................

[LeLou]

I've been living in a world so cold since you've gone away.
With no sound but the ticks of that clock on the wall.
Nothing here but cold emptiness and nothing to hear but those echoing ticks.
Everything seems frozen in time, but time doesn't seem to stop moving on.
Can't those hands tick backward?
Isn't there a way to turn back the time?

[LeLou]

المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة الــــدب Sometimes I have nothing to do. I think about taking a walk in the entire city, once a week. I like to walk alone, thinking about many things. There is nothing to write about. I just express my thoughts by writing it here, cause I want to improve my writing.

around

If you used to with like, it would be better not to use a gerund in the second clause.
So,it's better to say: 'I like walking alone, thinking about many things.'
or to be more accurate: 'I like walking alone while thinking about many things.'

I'm just expressing my thoughts by writing them here
And 'I have nothing to write about,' sounds more accurate.

المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة الــــدب Every thing in winter seems quiet, as I said in some of my poetry: I left you quietly without a word as quiet as winter nights. Although, there is one thing I hate about winter, the training in cold weather is so hard and painful.

Everything is one word; don't separate it into two words

And it's better to say:
In winter, everything seems quiet
or:
Everything seems quiet in winter.

I think you better revise that sentence which is marked with red.
I don't know why, but it doesn't sound quite right.

[LeLou]

المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة LeLou To be frank, the moderator of this forum is quite freak for choosing a theme like 'winter' in the middle of summer. And she wants to tell a fact about her that's going to make everyone thinks of her as freak even more. She likes warming herself in the cold. One of the most things she likes is wrapping herself with a blanket and holding a hot cup of coffee in her hands on a very cold day.

herself

[الــــدب]

Thank you very much LeLou

::::::::

In winter, I prefer hot chocolate and seating in a close fire place. It's called ( Mshab ). I like being in front of the fire, the heat radiates through my body and I like watching the flames and glowing coal. and the smell of the wood burning it feels more natural some reason.
^
^
hehehe

what a mess

[LeLou]

The theme of this week is going to be: SPACE

You can feature outer space, galaxies, celestial bodies, wideness, emptiness, or anything related to space in your writing.

[الــــدب]

I must read before I write about space. There is many informations I don't know it. what I know about the space, is few things. There is no air at all and that's scare me. I hear about Mars from NASA. I hear that the first man lands on the moon called Armstrong, I'm not sure. Also, there is thousands stars. I think space is beautiful, mysterious and cold.